NEW YORK (Reuters) -- Thanksgiving is traditionally a time to count our blessings and celebrate the spirit of good fellowship and cooperation that existed between the first pilgrims and their Native American benefactors. But when families come together, dinner can sometimes seem closer to the war path than the peace pipe. For a stress-free holiday, here are some family management tips offered in this month's issue of Men's Health:
-- In-law Diplomacy. Will your mother-by-marriage be attending the feast? Invite her to prepare a dish for the meal -- something she considers her specialty. If your relationship is a rocky one, "seat her between two conversationalists, far away from you," suggests psychiatrist Dr. Christian Hageseth III.
-- Family Feud Diffusion. Uncle Harry and Aunt Rose have been at loggerheads ever since the Bay of Pigs. Detente is more likely if you seat them on the same side of the table, with friendly forces betwixt to keep the peace.
-- Aren't They Cute? Kids will be kids, but you can stack the deck in your favor with a little advanced planning. Arrange for a kiddie table if space permits. Alternatively, seat the youngest guests (age 6 and under) next to their parents. Older kids and teenagers should sit where they like.
-- Mystery Date. Your sister unexpectedly turns up with Mr. X in tow, a guy she met recently on her trip abroad. Ask him to help with some hospitality chores -- serving the aperitifs, passing around hors d'oeuvres. He will meet the family more easily and feel at home.
-- Heimlich Know-How. Choking is a possibility at any meal, so knowing how to perform the Heimlich maneuver could save a life. Stand behind the victim and wrap your arms around him. Place your fists just above his belly button and thrust upward until he coughs up the food.
-- Giving Thanks. Try to keep the Thanksgiving grace short and sweet -- and don't forget to toast the family elders. Bon appetit.
SOURCE: Men's Health (November 1997, p. 45)
